Having won our second league game of the year and posting our first shutout, the Episcopal Academy football team was cocky. We had played on a Friday afternoon so we were free on Saturday to watch other league teams compete. A group of seven of us decided that we would all meet at EA at 1:30 and decide whether to go to the Haverford- Springside game or the Malvern-Germantown game. This decision nearly cost us our lives.
Javier del Noep and I rolled up to the athletic center around 1:25. Javier’s car smelled like burgers because we had just gotten back from Five Guys. Soon after, we saw John “Animal” Biguncomfortable, D.J. Cuturenemy, and Bryan Cub come flying into the parking lot followed by the Fettuccine brothers, Big and Little. Collectively, we assumed that Malvern was going to destroy GA so there would be no point in driving out to that game. We concluded that it would be beneficial to watch Haverford play Springside since they would be 2 of our next three opponents. We all climbed into the Fettuccine’s car, which proved to be a difficult task for the 5 seater, and began our trek out to Chestnut Hill, PA.
We arrived about 10 minutes before kickoff, so we had time to find our seats and identify who was who on the sideline. Springside’s playmakers were number 5, 3, and 81. We actually identified 81 as kid who looked similar to one of our teammates freshman year (Plousis), though much more athletic and funnier looking. We sat down in front of the Haverford student section who had bussed out a sizeable amount of kids to support the team.
The game started with Haverford kicking off. It was a back and forth game; neither time could seem to get into a rhythm. We watched a lot of 3 and outs and neither Haverford nor Springside appeared to pose a threat offensively. But then, the Fords had a breakthrough. Brendan Burke for Haverford got the snap a swung it out to number 14 Roger Reynolds. Reynolds, with the ball, made a nice move to the inside making the diving cornerback grab air. This play is generally designed to be a quick route and get 8 yards to move the chains, but Reynolds was hungry for a score. The receiver continued running the 80 yards towards the endzone. But Springside wasn’t going to give up 6 points that easily; a linebacker and safety were hot in pursuit. Reynolds, to his credit, is a very athletic player, but his athleticism was masked by his ego on this play. As he crossed the 5 yard line, about to give his team the lead, he raised his arms in celebration. To his surprise, the Springside safety had busted his ass down the field to catch up. Number 4 from Springside punched the ball out from Reynolds hands and the ball rolled out of the back of the endzone. Touchback, Springside’s ball.
Reynolds fell to the ground in shame. The EA fan section broke out in uncontrollable laughter, while the Haverford students stood in disbelief. That’s where stuff got messy. The Haverford kids, using some choice words, yelled at us to shut up. We responded, “Hey, we aren’t pulling for one team or the other; we are just laughing at the stupidity of your players.”
The Haverford kids took this offensively, for whatever reasons, and went on to take some personal shots at us and our team and our coaches. D.J. cautiously responded, “We are not trying to start a fight here or anything, but we did go 10-0 last year, so I would appreciate it if you shut up about our team. We beat you guys last year so you have no room to talk.”
The Haverford kids did not like our logic. “We have beaten you guys so many more times over the past 104 games and you are really going to bring up last year?”
Animal confidently responded, “Well that was the most recent game, and we won, so yeah we are going to bring that up.”
Haverford, knowing that they lost, reverted back to taking unwarranted personal shots at us and the girls at our school. Bryan Cub, who resides in Delco, got the most worked up. He screamed, “Fight me bitch!”
One Haverford kid replied, making fun of Cub’s teeth, “Why don’t you shut up and go get braces you piece of [waste]?” Cub lost it. He sprinted up the stands and shove the kid 4 rows back. All the other Haverford kids moved out of the way so that they wouldn’t get hit by their falling classmate. He tripped over the back row and fell off the bleachers on to the ground with his arm tucked behind him.
Immediately, the was an all-out brawl. Big and Little Fettuccine teamed up and Animal and DJ went to help out Cub who was getting mauled by 4 Haverford kids. I watched Javier sprint from the bleachers towards the parking lot.
I couldn’t do anything because of my torn ACL but I thought quickly on my feet to help out my boys. I took off my brace and chucked it at a Haverford kid. I hit him square in the back of the head and he flopped. That’s when Javier came zipping by in the Fettuccine’s car, “Run!” he screamed. “Let’s go!”
Everyone took off. Animal picked me up because I couldn’t run and he sprinted to the car with me in his arms. We got away from the scene as fast as we could. “Boy, that escalated quickly,” acknowledged D.J. as we set off.
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