“Mr. Dean sir, it seemed so ridiculous at the time, I don’t think I really considered the consequences. Nobody really thought they would actually do this.”
“I just don’t understand how that could ever have been a remotely good idea. I just don’t see any humor in this. Could you one more time explain to me just how this happened, Mr.Mason?”
“Yes sir, I can try.
It started out like a usual Saturday night. The senior members were the first there, setting up for the pledges to come. We were discussing possible pledging activities for new members. The obvious ones- streaking through campus or defacing a statue-came up, but we wanted to do something crazy and memorable. One of the upperclassmen suggested this idea and we ran with it. We were so into it mostly because we thought no one would ever follow through with this plan. Apparently we were wrong.
Underclassmen trickled in and by nine we had lined up all the pledges outside the house itself. They were trembling with fear, but possibly their lack of clothing and the cold weather well. Each one knew that they were about to do something really stupid, but none truly understood the scope of their stupidity.
As the lined up out there, we presented them with the challenge: stealing a campus police cruiser and getting in the frat house. The response was enthusiastic and without further instructions twenty fraternity pledges ran off into campus searching for a police car.
In the next hour, many of the twenty returned from their search empty-handed. Some were unable to find a car, some said they couldn't possibly get in one. Then to our surprise, a pack of 4 of the last 5 pledges came running towards the house shouting things. ‘We got it,’ ‘Holy Sh*t, we stole one.’ As we tried to understand what they were saying, the revving of an engine echoes through the green.
Sure enough, we turned around to see a campus police vehicle barreling across the quad. As it approaches, it does not seem to be slowing down. The clearly impaired pledge driving the vehicle showed no signs of stopping, so every member stand on the stairs of the house watching was shouting and gesticulating wildly. When this didn't work, we realized that we could only save ourselves, so we jumped out of the way and just in time. The vehicle smashed through the front window with a shatter. That how we wanted it to get into the house.
After the shock had worn off, a few of us walked towards the car to see if the driver had at least survived. We are greeted with a question.
‘Am I in?’”
“Well, it won’t matter once he is expelled.”
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