Graphics Poisoning with Beowulf

Chris Marino

Mr. O’Brien

English D

10/4/13

                                                Graphics Poisoning with Beowulf

             During class period, the class sat down and prepared to be awed.  We were about to watch the movie Beowulf.  Man we were all pumped getting ready to not learn and watch Beowulf kill all sorts of different creatures.  So I got myself ready, and suddenly…

            While I started watching Beowulf, I had trouble focusing on the film because of the really weird graphics that went along with the film.  I think that the movie would have been so much better if it was done with real people instead of the awkward looking almost real animation.  When Grendel came into the movie I honestly didn't think that the character himself was disgusting, but how bad the animation looked with him.  They could have done a much better job into this.  At times during later parts of the movie when they are flying over landscapes, at times it almost looks real.  Then they go to the characters in the movie and they just look so much different then the sweet looking landscapes.  And during the middle and the end of the movie definitely the weirdest part was when we saw that Angelina Jolie was Grendel's mother.  I mean they couldn't come up with anything better… No they had to be not creative and use Angelina Jolie, sure she’s attractive, but they couldn’t have made there own version of Grendel’s mother.

            Ok so in all I thought that the movie was pretty good, towards the end the movie did stray a little bit off of my book.  I am not going to go into many specifics because I don’t want the review to spoil it for you if you haven’t read the book.  I would have thought that it would have been more in line with the book, but I think that they still did a good job with making the end of the movie.  But I’m still stuck on the part where they decided to make the cartoon version of Angie. “You don’t need to wait for Angelina Jolie to rise from the vaporous depths naked and dripping liquid gold to know that this “Beowulf” isn’t your high school teacher’s Old English epic poem.” (Dargis)  I believe that Dargis uses a good form of satire here criticizing the fact that they are using an actual person to play Grendel’s mother instead of putting creativity into the hands of the movie creator and 3-D designers.

            Another topic that I want to mention is the fact that Angelina Jolie was not wearing anything but liquid gold… I truly don’t think this was entirely necessary, but not saying it didn’t make me laugh or make me feel “uncomfortable”.  It has the PG-13 rating for a reason, because some strict parents aren’t going to want there son/daughter watch something that is a little “inappropriate”.  If your watching Beowulf, you’re watching it because you want to see people fighting, as well as Beowulf being a truck.  Now about the PG-13 rating. How can a movie be rated PG-13 when it has female nudity? I'll tell you how. Because Angelina Jolie is not really there.  And because there are no four-letter words. Even Jolie has said she's surprised by the rating; the British gave it a 12A certificate, which means you can be a year younger and see it over there. But no, Jolie won't be taking her children, she told the BBC: "It's remarkable it has the rating it has. It's quite an extraordinary film, and some of it shocked me." (Ebert)  I completely disagree; this movie is a cartoon and has the proper rating for what is occurring in the movie.  There at no point is any actually nudity, and by the time that your thirteen years old I hope that you have a pretty good idea of what the human body looks like.  At times the battle scenes are pretty crazy, but there aren’t any guts and large amounts of blood flying all over the place.  Professionals judge this movie about what it should be rated, and they did a pretty good job.

            In conclusion I thought the movie was pretty good and I enjoyed watching it.  At times I did have some trouble focusing on what was going on because of the graphics were so sickening to my brain, and did such that til’ I almost couldn’t bear it any longer if it wasn’t for some of the battle scenes.  The graphics of the movie definitely needed some work to make it more appealing to the audience.  Angelina should not have been in the movie playing herself.  But again I thought that it was a decent movie.  I give it 5.5 stars/10.

          

“Confronting the Monster, Not to Mention His Naked Mom” Manhola Dargis http://movies.nytimes.com/2007/11/16/movies/16beow.html?_r=0

“Beowulf” Robert Ebert http://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/beowulf-2007